Funny One Liners Status

Bridget Larsen

15 Feb, 2022

Theres always that one person that catches you doing something weird. 8315 267 votes.

Best 65 One Line Funny Fb Status Whatsapp Quotes 2022 Trytutorial

Silence is better than lies.

. Attitude rude sarcastic work. One Line Status On Life I only learned one thing in life. Tweet it You can do anything but not everything.

Tweet it Kidnapping. Im great at multitasking. I had to put my foot down.

8317 1076 votes. Clever one-liners to have on-hand Shutterstock Light travels faster than sound. Most of these cute one liners are from the iconic comedians and others are from random people.

My favorite quote in the world is this one Richelle E. Always borrow money from a pessimist. Goodrich Salad isnt food.

I asked her why she drew the eyebrows that high and she seems surprised. A toad in a tank asked his friend can you drink this thing 5. Theres a light at every end of a tunnel just pray its not a train.

My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. Life is not a movie if the enemy is stronger than you. I can waste time be unproductive.

3 I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. 8461 657 votes. The smile on my face doesnt mean my life is perfect.

Salad is what food eats Sariah Wilson If you drink anymore youre going to be positively flammable Michaela Haze I just looked at the calendar and realized my days are numbered Johnny Moscato. Some of them are listed below. 2 Do not argue with an idiot.

If you dont care where you are then you aint lost. Funny One-Liners 1. Author comedy writer mum of five not the band.

Minds are like parachutes they only function when open. I just dont remember which ones yours. Here are some famous one liner jokes that can easily lift your spirits.

I failed math so many times at school I. Best One Liners 1. I prefer the term surprise adoption.

Others whenever they go A computer once beat me at chess. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any.

He wont expect it back. But all mine ever says is goodbye A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory Some cause happiness wherever they go. To quote my favourite Glasgow comedian The Big Yin.

Heathers first ever writing attempts were published right here on Hubpages. The longer the title the less important the job. 11 Clean One Liner Jokes Money talks.

I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs. I know what most of you are thinking. 8316 1075 votes.

They say money talks but mine can only say goodbye. Like the teacher at the camp for suicide bombers said Im only going to show you this once. You can touch each other but not each others phones.

Plus a slice of lemon. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths I always take life with a grain of salt. I am not lazy I just rest before I tired.

Good girls are bad girls who never get caught. And a shot of tequila I dont have a beer gut. Focus on your life goals couple goals can wait.

Before I criticize a man I like to walk a mile in his shoes. They ask you to be yourself and yet they judge you. Bursting out aloud in all its glory and fragrance.

When I say I am a bad electrician somebody gets shocked and my community still wonders why. I collected some WhatsApp status from the internet. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

That way when I do criticize him Im a mile away and I have his shoes. A man in not rewarded for having a brain but for using it well. My love for you is like a fart that cant be contained.

Forty Unique and Funny One-Liners For Your Facebook or Twitter Status. I am originally from Indiana. Original and Funny One-liners to use as Facebook Status Updates 1 I asked God for a bike but I know God doesnt work that way.

Funny Status for Lover or Spouse Im so happy for you that youve got the most good-looking partner ever. Excellent short status messages for Twitter and Facebook. You are so awesome that my middle finger salutes you.

Tweet it When Im on my death bed I want my final words to be I left one million dollars in the tweet it. If you cant convince them confuse them. Be so busy loving your life that you have no time for hate regret or fear.

I have no desire for money. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. I didnt change I just woke up.

Funny one liners status for facebook whatsapp Im great at remembering names. But it was no match for me at kickboxing My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

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